The way things are

It's been a long time since I made an update, and I figure I should address a few things.

When I'm in pain or going through a hard time, I hide. I withdraw. I don't talk about what I'm going through and I shut down. I ignore people who care about me. OK, maybe ignore isn't the right word. I sort of... go inside myself. And I've been doing that far too much lately.

At the end of May I sprained my foot. Nothing traumatic really happened; I walked around Disneyland all day and night in flip flops and at the end of it I noticed my foot was swelling. Two weeks went by and it didn't really get any better, so I went to a sports doctor. First I was in a walking boot, and then athletic shoes. Due to rheumatoid arthritis, I hadn't really worn closed shoes because they're uncomfortable so I had to actually go buy some!

Even after seeing a sports doctor and then a podiatrist, I'm still not to the point where I can walk for long distances. So far they have been telling me that injuries like this take a long time to heal and that's about all they can say. I was not happy with the doctors I saw and so I won't be going to them anymore. I can't encourage this enough -- if you are not happy with your doctor, change doctors! You and your insurance pays them so they work for YOU.

Anyway, due to the situation, I got very depressed for a while. I felt like I couldn't do anything, and not being able to walk much made my arthritis worse. For those of you with RA, you know that sitting around doing nothing is just about the worst thing you can do.

However, I do have a little bit of good news. I finally remembered that my place of employment has a free gym, so I popped in there and used the recumbent bike for 20 minutes.

That really improved my mood. I was feeling really good at the end of the day. The next day I walked about three quarters of a mile round trip to 7-11 from my work as well.

I also decided to see a physical therapist. My first appointment is Friday. My rheumatologist (who I AM very happy with) recommended it because my left elbow joint is stuck -- I cannot fully extend that arm and I haven't been able to for upwards of six months. This makes me really unhappy so I'm hoping that the physical therapist will have some ideas as to what I can do to un-stick it.

So. Hard times for me, I guess. On the upside, my son has started fourth grade and is doing great! He does have an aid again but things seem to be going a lot better this year. His behavior is great at school and rocky at home -- exactly what we want to see.

I have much to be thankful for, and I need to remember that. :)

So! That's where I am right now. I hope to post something a little happier and possibly food related soon. :)